Tagebuch eines Psychopathen - Der Blick in den Abgrund

Gestern Abend war es mal wieder so weit, ich wurde auf die Menschheit losgelassen. Gepusht von Adrenalin und Wut lief ich die Straße entlang auf der Suche nach einem Opfer, um mich von dem ganzen Druck zu befreien. Meine Augen waren blutunterlaufen und ich spürte wie jede Ader in meinem Körper pulsierte und kurz vor der Explosion stand, aber kein Mensch weit und breit...zumindest kein potentielles Opfer.

Man will sich ja nicht an schwächeren vergehen, daß macht gar keinen richtigen Spaß. Erst wenn die Gefahr besteht, sein eigenes Blut im Mundwinkel zu schmecken, wird’s richtig interessant.

Also habe ich mich dazu entschlossen in den erstbesten Club zu marschieren und dort erst mal Ausschau zu halten. Nach etwa 10 min und dem 15. Tequila tippte mir jemand auf die Schulter. Ab diesem Zeitpunkt liefen die folgenden 10 min. für mich in Zeitlupe ab. Ich drehte mich langsam um und vor mir steht ein breit grinsender Kerl. Wie ein Blitz durchfuhr mich der Gedanke: DAS IST ER!!! Insgeheim komme ich mir schon vor wie Hannibal Lector, der vor seinem nächsten Opfer sitzt und es kaum erwarten kann, von seiner Leber zu kosten.

Ich schaute dann diesem Kerl in die Augen, musterte ihn langsam von unten bis oben und suchte im Augenwinkel nach einer rumstehenden Flasche, die ich auch recht schnell fand. Daraufhin hörte ich mich sagen: "Verpiss dich du dummer dreckiger Hurensohn, du stinkst ausm Mund!" "Dumme Schlampe..." war dann seine Antwort. Ich glaube, ich war noch nie so glücklich beleidigt worden zu sein. Langsam habe ich mich umgedreht, gelacht, ihn am Kopf gepackt und ihm einen netten Herrn Dänemann verpasst. Dann griff ich zur neben mir stehenden Flasche und knallte sie ihm mit voller Wucht gegen den Schädel. Ich hörte wie sein Körper auf den Boden fiel und das klang in meinen Ohren wie ein Alarm: JETZT NOCHMAL! Und Bamm, ich stellte mir vor sein Kopf wäre ein Fußball und trat mit voller Kraft dagegen. Als ich gesehen hab, daß meine Schuhe Blutflecken vorweisen, habe ich direkt noch mal reingetreten, daraufhin desöfteren in den Magen und gegen die Beine. Der Kerl lag recht regungslos auf dem Boden und mir war (und ist) scheißegal was mit dem in dem Moment war. Auf einmal hielten mich eine Menge Arme fest, ich habe den dazugehörigen Köpfen teilweise noch einen Ellenbogen auf die Nase geben können, dennoch wurde ich von meinem Opfer weggezerrt.

Brother Ali - Sleepwalker


I do not have any memory of peaceful sleep
feels like I read about it in a novel once
I believe that all the little secrets people keep
When you drop your guard, and slumber, they come out and front
I crush to sleep for nothing, I'm left to beat the sun
And my breath, they keep it rushing, my chest, with deep percussion
If death and sleep are cousins, then justice is disgusting
We'll probably be cellmates behind Hell's gates
The devil lives inside my eyelids
When I close them I hit rising violence, I'm supposed to find some silence
Rockin' the back seat of insomniac theatre
With the answers in the subtitles, I just cant read em
I'm right where the fears at, fighting the tears back
Trying to catch my balance on life before the piers crack
I hear that, hate slammin my own little prison
I declare that, ?hate band?, my soul didn't listen
So I stare at, the crack in the ceiling until the earth go twistin
Glare at, that little feeling that I've been burdened with, its turbulant
Only you and I know that the hurt exists
Everyone else just see the surfaces


Somebody tell my mother that I died
Somebody tell my mother that I died
Somebody tell my mother that I died
Somebody tell my mother that I


I can only hope that, when I wake up at night in cold sweats
That you're suffering and miserable in your own bed
I pray I haunt you the way you haunt me
The way I feel I never want to see you walk free
I hope your thoughts will burn as you toss and squirm
And curse your life, feeling like you lost your turn
And I pray that I haunt you the way you haunt me
The way I feel I never want to see you walk free
I can only hope that, when I wake up at night in cold sweats
That you're suffering and miserable in your own bed
I pray I haunt you the way you haunt me
The way I feel I never want to see you walk free
I hope your thoughts will burn as you toss and squirm
And curse your life, feeling like you lost your turn
And I pray that I haunt you the way you haunt me
The way I feel I never want to see you walk free
Fuck you Ali!


Somebody tell my mother that I died
Somebody tell my mother that I died
Somebody tell my mother that I died
Somebody tell my mother that I


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Necro - Sick of you


I'm sick of you 
What? I'm sick of you 

I'm sick of you I need robitussin, don't make me start bustin
You so depressed, you can't let me enjoy a minute
You make me sick, like I ate food with poison in it
You played out, you're too repetitive
Give me a sedative before my brain gets negative 
and I get the fever for the flavour of a shankin
Right in your throat G, cause on your bullshit I've OD'd
I've had it! You lying in the habit like a teenager in tablets
Likie carrots and rabbits, automatics and religious fanatics


I'm sick of you 
Fucking bitch.. I'm sick of you 
Pass me the Excederin before I bash your fuckin head in


I ain't feelin you
The only thing I feel's an allergic reaction
Pass the medication, you got me sick like a patient
Digestin your weak conversation
Shut the fuck up cause I'm not patient 
But I'm mental, you might catch laceration
Wanna be hard rock, STOP, play at your age
I'm sick from you pussies; like I fucked y'all and you had AIDS
My stomach feelin obscure, the only cure is a knife into your dick
Suck enjoy it, stop you from rappin cause your style's poor

I'm sick of you 
I'm sick of you 
Pass me an Advil before I make you travel below some gravel


I get nauseated, from a DJ with a wack playlist
And court for six hours of lookin at his dickhead baliff
Criminal court is like a virus clinic, cause I'm sick
Once I'm in it, the disease called annoyin grows each minute
Go get your own style, you ain't sick enough
Yo I got a headache son, cause you're suckin my dick too much
And that's the only way shit like you will grow up
My acid lunch, eat you up, you make you wanna throw up


I'm sick of you 
I'm sick of you 
Hand me a Bufferin before you catch a fuckin snuffin

Bitch! I'm fuckin sick of you!
Fuckin bitch-ass motherfuckers, shady sluts!
WHAT!


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Mr. Lif - Home of the Brave

Now let's talk about self expression, true expression
Open your minds without question
No doubt, tell me what you're thinking about
Let's try to set aside pride and clout
Can you believe I feel the same exact way you do?
You truly do believe these modern ways have fooled you
Systems exist so we never meet each other
Pretty soon from now that I'll long the word "brother"
And that's true if they see you walking with a crew
If you don't know, that means more than two
I'll tell you what they'll do
They'll pull over, hunt you over
Kick your ass, nightstick to your shoulder
I know it's unjust, as if it wasn't enough
If you try to fight back they're locking your ass up
And Chuck already told you that a cell is hell
But I'm waiting for the phone so I'll sit for a spell
Call the guard, tell him I'm a piece of God
With no beliefs in his streets or his boulevards
I eat, read so my mental is hard
And the heat from my anger just melted the bars
They reach for their guns so I put them to sleep
Break the chains and put the shoes back on my feet
He's on the loose with no discernible scars or marks
Just the mind of Mandela and the heart of Rosa Parks
So I dip, time to see the governor and mayor
Tell them life ain't fair and see if they care
Well they do, but only if they are the heir
So they appear to have a heart and make a flair
But they haven't done shit for us and that's a fact
Their only function is to keep the funny money where it's at
And it causes pain, stress
Ask me if we need a different way of life (yes)

Headline: Bush steals the presidency
He needs the backing of the media what could the remedy be?
The country's headed for recession reminiscent of the Great Depression
Are lives worth a world of power?  Easy question
Planes hit the towers and the Pentagon
Killing those the government wasn't dependant on
It's easy to control the scared so they keep us in fear
With their favorite Middle Eastern demon named Bin Laden this year
Bush disguises blood lust as patriotism
Convincing the living to love "Operation Let's Get 'Em"
But when he realized we don't support their attacks
They needed something to distract, hmm, anthrax
This further demonizes Afghanis
So Americans cheer while we kill their innocent families
And what better place to start a war
To build a pipeline to get the oil that they had wanted before
America supported the Taliban
To get Russia out of Afghanistan
That's how they got the arms in
They're in a war against the Northern Alliance
And we can't build a pipeline in hostile environments
Here's what your history books won't show:
You're a dead man for fucking with American dough
They killed several birds with one stone
While you're at home with anti-terrorism up in your dome
But my eyes are wide open and my TV is off
Great, 'cause I save on my electricity cost
And you can wave that piece of shit flag if you dare
But they killed us because we've been killing them for years


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El-P - Deep Space 9mm

One two
Get behind the walls of new Roma, wanna buy the farm
But the land's not yours to own?
Who owns Police? Who holds floor grease on a sandy beach?
Blood beach
Dance with a man he starts clutching, he ugly
Punks hung halo teach
Hugged by the math with the cable reach
A hundred and sixty-six channels lit
To train that animal shit
Where the mind's eye redefined
Where's God? 
Buy a car, Kick tires
 
Back in  Eighty-Six I lived
With a four-course artistry
Metal ones took turns showin' off colors and shit
Like I invaded the mating dance ritual
Criminal now
Wild things defined beautiful under my power
El Producto flash-fest-iss
Motherfuckers be like, "Ow, why haven't we left yet"
Blithering sideway twang, the youth and brain management troupe
The man is like BOOOP
You can't touch the Krush Groove
I live by the lunch table
Touched fables
Ducked labels
Lookout for the one he'd abide with the terrible stables
Signed to Rawkus
I'd rather be mouth fucked by Nazis unconscious
Callin' all bomb threats
Radio re-activated, caress
Under hella-ified missle defense
Fenced in, better blame it on fame shit and grin
Walk with a bag full of kittens
Take it to the river and throw yourself in
In about four seconds the ether will begin to leak
 
Who wanna hold hands with this sicko malnutritionist
Soaked in newspeak?
Dissolve into the syncopated fragments of vinyl 
splashed on loose leaf
We can embrace on the business end of my face first
Joe vs. the Volcano suicide beef
Dance with the vinyl monster
Devil in a blue skyline with clean conscience
Save the gesture
But can't save the children, weren't worth the effort
I'm a Caveman
Your modern ways frighten and confuse me
I watch your spirit box with the blinking lights and think
Are those little people trapped in that box? (No, Caveman)
But I do know converted mic digital 8-bus Mackie Avalon compression 
Combined with 8-step effected
Dirty words paralyze words and infect shit
Infectious
Insofar as the ineffectual bed for elections              
Development arrested
Trapped in the Cuckoo's nest
Looking for the nexus
If it's wild like that y'all found 
infrared scope in the clutch of a tyrant
New World lullaby Sirens
Stuck migrants, bust 'em by violence
It's all bad timing
Getting merked on a Tram over Roosevelt Island
You think that's spacey?
Deep Space 9 millimeter, son, keep smiling
 
This is for the fringes and such
My generation just sit like dust
Feed 'em off of us and ask what I trust
Tell these stories, I'm right here holdin' my nuts
Right here holdin' my nuts
Right here holdin' my nuts
Right here holdin' my nuts
Right here holdin' my nuts

This is for the fringes and such
My generation ain't friends with slugs
Thank god for the drugs and drums
Tell these to read it, I'll be right here hidin' from guns
Right here hidin' from guns
Right here hidin' from guns


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Swollen Members - Valentine's Day Massacre


slightly schizophrenic borderline psychotic
sensational recreational narcotics
I thought I lost it but I found it
temptation marches along till I'm surrounded
inspired by fire the sensual illusion
caught between the crossfire anger and confusion
howl at the moon black blanket that's starlit
I'm rarely romantic plowing through tramps and harlots madchild prevails 
tails of the unwanted
not to be taken for granted
my past has come back and haunted for real
I've all ready danced with death. a dozen black roses
I pose with babies breath
be afraid a place where magic is made
I'll rain on your parade with silver razor blades
I'm creepin over the fence crawlin through your back yard
my mind states intense
savage penetration on the rocks with a twist
now scream and shake your fists
cause dreams are made of this


for real the opposite transmit telepathic
Roamin' the flats with automatics and back packs
Doin' jacks for Big Macs
Accumulatin' stacks to make G's Nigga please, you artificial


You dropped somethin', it's your heart
An' it's still pumpin', pumpin' you from this existence
It seems to be absolutely mandatory, cause you be manipulatin' skin
But no way, because you fake I can trace out your image
Even though you don't cast one, I smell a rat, I'm smellin' that
Stay back at least 150 inches
You brew tea? an I know you know I can sense it
With the nostrils innocently mixed with 6 hostile stenches
Henceforth the elbow swings dinging, we bring whip to bleed scalps
Swingin' sleep out your mouth
How long you been hibernatin'? Too long!
You're abiding and aiding a felon, to switch your melon
Droppin' grammar like a judges hammer
I feel you mark, feel me feel your chart
You gotta be real an you gotta to have heart
You gotta to be real an you gots to have heart


Stir the blur, nuts and bolts whirl
Stored in electric ports, 4 strong boxes of 10 floors
Shift the weight towards the door, in hopes of escape
When hands on cord, the blazing roof Prev creates
Sound break, concord, eye of the condor
Hand skills of a saboteur, your in for
A war that pours coarse of molten into cords
Strung by the young ones, put me on tour
No folk lore horsemen for poison, pour in skin pores
Soft rhymers, metamorphize their cartoon characters
Grafted from Africa, in this game you got no stature
Not even a factor in this
Whole shit makes me yawn
Snatch your heart out your chest like a '96 ghetto spawn
Antonym of urban, too feminine for this cut-throat mentality
Have ? thoughts in my area, you get snatched out your Suburban
Fallacy with no antidote, in this ? your age get broke
Runnin' from gun smoke, ballin' never rumin'
Silver spoons crumbin' from flavour
Soon there will be no overseer to save ya
When I delve, tell your podiatrist it's a size 12
National ? Soldiers, leakin' a swine
A snake with no spine, I'll see you, I peeped you
You'll see blue, the fake
A quick death is your fate
Now, I got shit to do


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Saul Williams - Fearless

I don't know whether to laugh or cry
and I don't know whether to live or die
I kept my love for her locked deep inside
it cuts like a knife
she's out of my life
out of my life, out of my hair
out of my mind, there's no love in there
I move on, move on

dear God, I wasn't breast fed
and most of my conversations with men seem to revolve around music
I'm no musician but the pain has been instrumental
my sense finally tune the instruments of - of - of
of being lonely, of being lost, of being loved, of being human
man I could use a metaphor but I can't get beyond this shit
I could use someone to talk to
but most of my conversations with men seem to revolve around music

I am a poet who composes what the world proses
and proses what the world composes

I am a poet who composes what the world proses
and proses what the world composes

damned indescion and cursed pride
I kept my love for her locked deep inside
and I don't know what to do
to get it through to you
get out of my life tonight
get out of my life
out of my life, out of my hair
out of my mind, 'cause no lovin' fair
I move on, move on

she had nothing but time on her hands
silver rings, turquoise stones and purple nails
I rub my thumb across her palm
a featherbed where slept a psalm
yay though I walked, I used to fly, and now we dance
I watch my toenails blacken and walk a deadened trance
'til she woke me with the knife edge of her glance
I have the scars to prove the clock strikes with her hands

and I don't know what to do
to get it through to you
and I don't know what to do
to get it through
out of my life, out of my hair
out of my mind, 'cause no lovin' fair
I move on, move on, I move on